Life IS fair! People have said to me, “I can’t believe this happened to you, life just isn’t fair sometimes.” Guess what? Life is always fair. I have so many blessings and a great life! I could believe it happened to me. Why not me? Bad stuff and good stuff happens to all of us. The trajectory of your life just depends on what you look at, the good things or the bad stuff.
I spent so much time in “venting” so many times with friends complaining about life, our husbands, what was wrong with our businesses, and how hard life was. I always focused on what I needed to improve. What was wrong with my husband and my marriage? Then I had this stretch of time when I literally could not remember a single thing that I would change about him after he was gone. All I could see was his greatness and the things I would miss for the rest of my life. I vowed at that moment to never again focus on what was wrong. I would only focus on what in my life I would miss if it were gone. I would spend every day walking in the light of gratitude. This whole idea is the first step in an exceptional life.
The point is that you see what you look at. We get to choose what we see in our lives. We can choose to focus on what we would miss if we didn’t have it, couldn’t do it, etc., or we could just see all the hassles, all the people who aren’t doing it the way we want to do it.
Wallace Wattles, who wrote The Science of Getting Rich said, “You cannot exercise much power without gratitude because it is gratitude that keeps you connected to your power.” I’ll buy that. When I am grateful and focusing on the positive in my life, I feel so powerful. If I have been given, created, and been responsible for maintaining all of this, I must be pretty darn powerful.
I certainly can trip up here; we all can. I have days where I have a pity party and I literally have to employ the pennies in my pocket game to feel grateful. I start the day with 10 pennies in my left pocket and every time I feel grateful for something or am counting a blessing I move a penny to my right pocket. By the end of day all 10 have to be in my right pocket. Sometimes it is simply being glad I didn’t fall when I tripped over the curb to get my brain to start noticing the positive. I start every day by thinking about what is good in my life. Before I even get out of bed I set the tone for seeing what I would miss. Then I end each day with a gratitude journal, just a quick note to fall asleep remembering the greatness that came out of the day.